“But now, O LORD, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand.”
Isaiah 64:8
When life hurts.
Do you ever look back over your life and see only disappointed dreams? Have things turned out the way you planned, or did life detour you unexpectedly? Sometimes what we want is delayed or even unfulfilled. We may not be able to control everything that happens to us, but we can control how we choose to trust God with the details of our lives.
I’ve always been a bit of an achiever. While growing up, I worked in home construction with my dad, who was always busy working. Although I learned to have a strong work ethic, I can also easily slip into a workaholic mindset. The more I work and the more goals I achieve, the more I’m worth, or so I tell myself.
Careers, goals, corporate ladders. We want to get somewhere and be recognized or validated. But what happens when we can’t achieve something? Are we worth any less? Has God’s plan in our lives failed?
Purpose in the mess.
When I moved to Los Angeles in the fall of 2014, I really had my heart set on working in story development for an animation company. I worked so hard to network, apply for internships, beef up my resume for job applications, and make connections with people in the industry. No matter what I did, it was never enough to get my foot in the door for my dream job.
The company that did seek to hire me, though, was not one I would have chosen for myself. I had never wanted to work in reality TV production. It simply was not an interest for me at the time. But, I knew in my heart the internship they offered me was God’s next step for me.
I started working full time for this company within a few months of finishing my internship. Although it wasn’t my dream job, it was very humbling and I worked with them for several years. I swept floors, cleaned kitchens, and later got hired full time on several of their TV shows, which, for many people, was a dream come true. I developed contentment and peace in knowing that I was right on track with God, even if it meant being a million miles away from my dreams.
During that season of life, I started realizing that God had other dreams and plans for me than I had for myself. I had a community full of amazing people I met at several local churches. I grew in ways I never thought possible while living in LA, and I can honestly say that while my plans failed God’s plan was coming to the surface.
Heart over goals.
I think we tend to overemphasize the importance of specific goals in our lives. Rather than focusing on the person we are becoming, we focus on what we are doing. Sometimes the work God is doing in our hearts outweighs the importance of us meeting our goals or getting what we want.
Looking back on my experience in Los Angeles, I am quite glad I never landed my dream job at Disney or DreamWorks. God used this experience of not getting what I wanted to work greater contentment and trust in my life. Listening to God in periods of disappointment helped me understand that God wanted better things for my life than I wanted for myself.
He wanted me to have freedom from the need to achieve or obtain a position or title. He wanted me to live in a place of contentment and peace rather than striving. He wanted me to settle down and know His love rather than seek fulfillment in my work and goals.
Takeaway Action/Challenge: What has God been doing in your heart? How has He been using your goals or experiences to change something inside of you? How can you pause to acknowledge and respond to His guidance?
